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The awesome beauty of crystallized precipitation... The joy of uniting with people who share a common genetic structure... Hard-shelled, protein-rich foodstuffs combusting over a potential fire-hazard... This is the stuff of Christmas song. Yet, I can't help but feel there are other topics ...
Humor
So you think you might be living next door to a flesh-eating zombie, but want to be sure. In suburbia, a neighbor with a glazed expression and red-stained clothes may not, in fact, be zombified. Mrs. Johnson might just be one Cosmo away from forgetting how much she hates PTA meetings. Or ...
Humor
The Ten
Last week, Of Cabbages and Kings had its second not-necessarily-annual-yet-really-spiffy giveaway contest , where participants had to predict which tribulations and turns my Thanksgiving travel plans would take. The one who got closest to what really happened would get a piece of Florida ...
Humor
“Family Friendly.” One of the airport security lines was labeled this in large cheerful letters. Which got me wondering what that said about the other lines. Like the one I was in. I know it probably was supposed to mean that they’re required by law to yell at you 50% less when it takes you 20 ...
Humor
Denis Leary
So, for some pre-Thanksgiving fun, I thought we here at Of Cabbages and Kings would play a giveaway game. Right now, Yours Truly is flying off for Turkey Day festivities to the Sunshine State. And because this involves the Wacky Wonders of Air Travel-- --Where one errant metal hair barrette ...
Humor
Thanksgiving: food... Fellowship... 30 people crammed into a dining room the size of a shoebox, half of them with food allergies, though none of them the exact same ones... The potential for someone swelling up bigger than the Macy's Day Garfield balloon adds that extra layer of thanks onto ...
Humor
Facebook's starting to sound like dear old Mom. In its deep desire for us all to be happy and connected (and feed lonely farm animals), Facebook has developed a Suggestions sidebar-- --Or what I like to call the "Simulated Maternal Nagging Feature." This app checks out who's active on your ...
Humor
My bud Scoobie and I have discovered an unmet marketing need. When stepping into one of these big-box mega hardware stores, we've decided each layman-- unskilled in the mysterious ways of "fixed wall flanges" and "collated balluster connectors"-- should be issued a Complimentary Dad for the ...
Humor
"It's the thought that counts." That's what adults tell kids about gift-giving after they've unwrapped the seventh annual itchy, orange knit sweater with a kitten appliqued on it from Great Aunt Eunice. Eventually, years of orange kitten pullovers, and pen sets, and copies of Dan Rather's ...
Humor
Who is the single hardest working individual online today? It must be the unflappable.... the infamous... the ever-present... Anonymous. Anyone who has a blog, a web site, or a forum knows him well. He's the one who makes sure your quality online acreage is covered with spam like cow pats on ...
Humor
Who can you depend on, to stand strong in the fight against injustice, untruthiness and pricey shoe rentals?... The Injustice League , that's who! Pre-approved and properly-insured A-list superheroes (and amateur bowling league) for the city of BurghTown! The Injustice League are... Lady ...
Humor
There are two places I go regularly where the customer service is protected by a plexiglass fishtank. Now, you'd think one of these would be the bank, right? The one place where we all expect to see Edward G. Robinson with a big cigar sticking out of his mouth, carrying an instrument case ...
